Written piece
Cheers From Beyond
Adelina Gotera
Canada
About this piece
Cheers From Beyond is about an uninvited guest who happened to be a little bird who flew into my room, and hovered for some minutes above my bed, where I was lying down in the wee hours of the morning of July 2020. I was diagnosed with metastatic breast cancer, and was in anguish
The World Health Organization declared the novel coronavirus outbreak a global pandemic on March 11, 2020.
Four months later, I was diagnosed with metastatic breast cancer.
On that pitch-black July night, I stood by the balcony of our condominium on the 36th floor and stared at the blanket of stars. I twisted my mouth, clenched my fists, and yelled. “Why me!”
A feeling of weakness lingered for several days.
Awake, with eyes closed, in the middle of the night, my mind was preoccupied with the birth control pills I had swallowed in between my two pregnancies, and, as I aged, the multitude of hormone replacement tablets I took for the prevention of menopausal symptoms.
My tormenting dreams exposed my guilt and self-conceit, instilling within me the tablets that fed my vain desire to stay young, agile, and vigorous.
I gulped for air; it was hard to breathe.
Nervous about the preparations for surgeries and other medical appointments, my feelings were on a roller coaster. I giggled over silly jokes thrown by folks at my home. At times, I hummed a happy tune when I received well-wishes from family and friends.
Yet there were times when I could lie on the bed, with narrowed eyes and curled upper lip, or sit by the window, withdrawn from everybody else.
I felt exhausted to the limits. My body and brain wilted from weariness. I shook my head and shouted repeatedly, “No,” when family members tried to talk to me.
Then one wee morning hour, while I lay on my bed half awake, I saw a tiny bird hovering above me. Unable to move, my gaze was fixed on the tiny creature. My breathing quickened, my eyes sparkled, and then tears kept on flowing.
My winged visitor instilled acceptance and strength.